This past Sunday, we hear the “Doubting Thomas” passage from the Gospel of John. I call it that because that’s what we often refer to it as, and it’s the main focus of homilies. And even though Thomas has a strong faith, so much so that he’s one of the few outside the main Apostles who says something more than once in the Gospels, this is what he’s known for and often referred to as.

But maybe he’s not as bad as the rest of the Apostles. After all, the setting begins with the disciples, in fear of the Jewish leaders, hiding behind locked doors. This is Easter Sunday, and they were told by Mary Magdalene that she saw Christ.

Yet these guys are still hiding out of fear.

So why wasn’t Thomas with them? Maybe he heard Mary’s witness and went out boldly to look for him. Maybe the reason he wanted to see Jesus himself wasn’t because he doubted God, but because he doubted the other disciples, because they were envious of Thomas’ boldness and he wondered if they were making it up to try to make themselves feel better for hiding.

Maybe this passage is more about trusting the witness of the Apostles (aka the Church) regardless of some of their actions. That we can know that the bread is truly Christ’s Flesh and the wine is truly His Blood when it is consecrated in the Holy Mass, whether we can actually see, feel, smell, or taste Him or not.

So that’s not what I intended to talk about, but it just came out as I was writing and I’m going to leave it there.

Back to the locked doors…

When we read this passage, as noted before, Thomas is the main character. But look at the context – first time Jesus appears is Sunday. Thomas wasn’t there. The next time, Thomas is there. And we get this beautiful profession of faith from him – “My Lord and my God!”

But where does Jesus appear? In the same place. With the doors locked again. Jesus has already appeared to them, and He’s breathed the Holy Spirit on them, commissioning them to go out and forgive (or retain) sins.

Yet these guys are still hiding out of fear (it doesn’t say it’s out of fear this time, but with everything else being the same, why would they lock the doors?).

We are the disciples behind locked doors.

Week after week. We come to Mass. We hear the Word of God, we pray the prayers, we see and consume Jesus. And then we are commissioned to go out in the world. But do we actually do anything different with out lives? Do we try to become who God created us and continuously calls us to be?

Most of us don’t. We might not lock the doors when we attend Mass, but we keep whatever we believe, whatever we hear, and whatever we commit to locked up.

Fr. Aidan Kavanagh writes in his book, On Liturgical Theology, that in worship we are often brought to “the edge of chaos,” because what God challenges us to do with our lives would drastically change how we live. It doesn’t often feel like that, likely because we aren’t really paying attention. We aren’t taking the message to heart, into our daily lives, because we’ve heard it so many times. We also get distracted by everything else that demands our attention, or so we put our faith – and God – on the backburner. But if we really, sincerely think about it, what Christ leads us to do with our lives is crazy. Do you actually love you enemies? Do you truly humble yourself when faced with opposition or challenges? Do you honestly die to ourselves? Maybe sometimes, but it is easy to make excuses.

It’s also so incredibly easy to just point fingers at all the people who we see as worse than us. And I am so guilty of this. Often times I hear a message at Mass, and my immediate thought is of someone in my life who I think really needs to hear it. Only if I’m fortunate do I realize that it’s me who really needs to hear it.

And so, over 2,000 years later, many of us continue to hide our faith – and our mission – behind the locked doors of our hearts. Let’s try to make next Sunday – and every day after – a little different.

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %

Carry your cross.

I’ve heard this so many times.

And yet there’s the beauty in our faith and in our God – that no matter how many times we’ve heard a story from Scripture, God can always reveal something new to us. Sometimes it’s because we’re in a different place in our lives spiritually – or physically. Sometimes it’s because we weren’t ready for the (personal) revelation.

I had this happen recently when I was reflecting on Jesus carrying the cross. Or rather, Simon.

Not Simon Peter, but Simon the Cyrenian. Which, before, didn’t really seem significant to me. Okay, two dudes named Simon, just a coincidence.

But God doesn’t really do coincidence, does He? And names are a pretty big deal throughout Scripture, right?

(Before I get into this any further, let me say that this was something that came to me personally, and I do not have any knowledge that the following is actually why what happened happened.)

Okay, so we have Simon the Cyrenian basically forced to carry the cross. Yes, it represents us carrying our crosses, walking with Jesus…

…but what if there’s another layer to it?

What if it was a message to Simon Peter? We know he wasn’t present at the cross, but maybe he was hiding in the crowd. Or more likely he heard what happened later on from John or another disciple.

But I wonder if Jesus wanted Simon Peter to know that it should’ve been him that carried the cross. That yes, Simon was supposed to be carrying the cross, just not that one. Because Simon Peter did say that he would die with Jesus before denying Him. But he did deny Jesus, so he didn’t get to die with Jesus. And so the point is made by Jesus: You denied me, and so this Simon is taking your place. He is carrying your cross instead of you doing it yourself. Because you hid. Because you ran away. Because you were afraid of being persecuted.

That’s intense. Especially when, as we should often do with Scripture, place ourselves in it. How many times have I said that I will carry my cross? How many times have I said yes, Jesus, I believe in You and want to live for You and die to myself for You? A lot less times than the amount of times I’ve denied Jesus. Not outright denial like Simon Peter, but denial by not talking about God when I felt prompted to. Not defending my faith when it’s been mocked. Not serving others when I know I should. Not making sacrifices because it wasn’t convenient (spoiler alert: if sacrifices were convenient, then they would no longer be a sacrifice).

We are all called to carry our cross, following our Lord. But when we deny Jesus in our hearts, we choose ourselves. And when we choose ourselves, we choose not to carry the cross. How often do you feel prompted to pray, or to donate, or to help someone, but you make excuses not to, or that you’ll get to it later? We keep denying God’s will in those little moments and choose our own. And when we do that, we choose to run away from the cross that God intended for us to carry.

Don’t let your fear allow someone else to do what God created you to do.

P.S. Maybe that’s why St. Peter couldn’t die on a cross in the same way Jesus did, because he didn’t carry the cross Jesus carried.

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %

Holy Thursday is coming up this week, where people squirm at the thought of touching someone else’s feet, or someone else touching their own feet.

Growing up at our parish, it was open season – anyone could get in line to have their feet washed and then in turn wash the next person’s feet. I always went before one of my parents so I could wash their feet – not because I wanted to serve them, but because I didn’t want to touch someone else’s dirty feet. As I got older, I didn’t care who was behind me, I was ready. I started to really love this tradition – the beauty, the humility, the example of service and Christ.

And then some people in charge decided to change it to the parish priests and staff only washing twelve parishioners’ feet. I was quite upset. I thought it took away from the meaning behind it. I wasn’t going to let this go, so I put my foot down. But they still won’t wash it.

Anyways, in the Gospel, Peter tells Jesus He isn’t washing his feet. Jesus’ response makes Peter flip faster than a flapjack on fire (no, I don’t normally call pancakes flapjacks, but the alliteration!).

Jesus tells Peter he “will have no inheritance with Me.”

Just for not getting his feet washed? Seems extreme, doesn’t it?

Our society – and this includes many of us who call ourselves Catholic – portrays Jesus as someone who won’t make you sweat the small stuff that most people don’t think are sins today. But if Jesus is telling the future pope he needs to get over whatever he thinks is enough to follow Jesus, then I think we need to do that as well.

Too often we make excuses for the teachings of the Church that we don’t want to follow. We are ignorant in thinking that Jesus will forgive us no matter what, and that we can get away with the sins we see as less important. We are arrogant in thinking that if Jesus won’t forgive us for sins we chose not to try to avoid, then He’s not as loving as He claims.

It’s not that Jesus expects us to be perfect. But we do have to try. Yoda was wrong y’all. When we refuse to try because we think we are right and the Church/Jesus is wrong, that’s when it’s dangerous.

As we approach the Holy Triduum, we need to allow Jesus to wash us – not just our feet, but our souls. There are parts of us that we keep dirty – that we don’t allow to be cleansed. If we aren’t willing to let Jesus into those areas and get to work, we will remain dirty. Let Him in. Let Him wash you, so that you may have a part in His inheritance.

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %

All too often, people get confused on who the Immaculate Conception is about. Today, December 8th, is the Solemnity for the Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary. By that title, we should be able to figure out that it’s the Conception OF Mary, not Mary’s Conception of Jesus. But we don’t. And by we, I mean Catholics, not people outside the Church.

Reasonably, Jesus can’t be conceived and then two weeks later be born. His day of conception is celebrated on March 25th – that’s right, nine months before Christmas – and that is known as the Feast of the Annunciation (when Angel Gabriel comes to Mary and announces that she will be the Mother of God).

Yet it is still quite understandable for people to not know or remember that today is about Mary’s conception, not her Son’s, especially when you read the Gospel for today.

IT’S WHEN GABRIEL COMES TO MARY. IT’S ABOUT JESUS’ CONCEPTION.

What the what, Church?! I know we don’t have a gospel reading that refers to Mary’s conception, but come on! How are people not supposed to be confused on what’s being celebrated today?? How about keeping it to the Magnificat or something?

And I checked – this isn’t some one-off reading for this cycle – this is every single year.

Obviously, it’s not going to change, but it does make me wonder how this was decided as the best reading for today. People already have misconceptions of Church teachings, we shouldn’t be making it harder.

Oh Blessed Virgin Mary Immaculately Conceived, pray for us.

Oh P.S. today is a Holy Day of Obligation so if you haven’t gone yet, you should try to go!

P.P.S. in looking for an image to use, I came across @visualgrace.sacredart, who also shared with this image some text that said the Annunciation and Mary’s sacred womb points to why Mary needed to be Immaculately Conceived…so there’s the connection to today’s readings. . . so okay Church, good on you for being thoughtful and intentional I guess. But I still hold that it’s confusing!

The cover image painting is by Kate Capato, who you can find at the Instagram account about or her website – visualgrace.org.

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %

We’ve got a little one in the house, and he needs his naps.

I need his naps.

So, more often than I’d like, I have to remind his siblings to be quiet when he’s sleeping.

In my mind, I have to remind them more often than I should.

I got frustrated with them recently (again), asking why I have to keep reminding them – he’s over eight months and still, multiple times while he’s napping, I have to say it.

Because he (I) need his naps.

They have such a hard time doing this one thing for him (me), yet they constantly want to do what they want and forget about keeping quiet.

I don’t need them whispering or just sitting, but he’ll be napping and they’re dragging each other around the house banging into things and yelling.

And it made me realize (likely not for the first time) how often God has to remind us to do this one thing (the greatest commandments), yet I keep getting distracted by what I want to do.

But my argument to God is that those commandments aren’t just “one thing (two things), because it affects EVERYTHING we do and think.

Yet at the same time, during those naps, that one thing of keeping quiet affects everything my children want to do.

Actually they need to think about it when he’s not sleeping as well, because if they only think about it when he’s napping, they’re not making a habit out of it and it’s harder to turn on and off that thought.

I guess in the same way, if we only think about God and His commandments when we are at church or praying (or when we think we need Him), we don’t develop good habits all the other hours of the day.

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %

There’s a stage in a child’s life where they want to be helpful.

Of course, it’s not in the way you want them to be helpful – at least not in my opinion. Cleaning up after themselves? Doing things the first time they’re told? Nah, those things aren’t helpful.

But a 3 year old helping me make dinner – now that is super helpful. Especially if I want it to take twice as long to make and me stressing out more than the child is going to get burned or break something.

Even so, it is sweet that they want to help. They just want to be older and do what we do. So naive.

It’s kind of like how we are with God. Except that God not only likes it when we help, but that’s kind of His whole game plan. Does God need us to bring others to heaven? Does God need us to heal the world? Not in the slightest.

But out of His infinite love and wisdom, that is what He desires. Even if we break some plates and get hurt, God wants us to help, even though we get in the way.

Maybe that’s part of the reason why Jesus told His disciples (us) that we need to become like children – because as children, they just have this desire to help because they want to spend time with us and do what we do. That’s what God wants. As adults, we might want to do what God wants, but we want to do it on our own and in our own way.

I need to be better at allowing – and appreciating – my children’s help, even if it isn’t all that helpful. Getting to be a part of what we do helps them to feel included and loved.

I also need to recognize that I can’t just sit idly and selfishly do what I want. God wants us to bring His love in the world. Even though God could do it better, and He has others who are more efficient and know how to do it right, that can’t be my excuse to sit back and do nothing.

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %

Have you ever had a child (or student) ask you this question? You tell them to do something – or ask – and their response is

Why?

Now, I’m all for learning and inquisitive minds. It is beautiful and wonderful to have kids want to learn and see their curiosity thrive…

however.

This question can be one of the most annoying things to hear after saying something to a child.

But it’s not usually when they’re actually being inquisitive and want to understand something. It’s to get out of something, to delay it, to be defiant, to prove you don’t know what you’re talking about, or to – dare I say it? – intentionally be annoying.

And so it is with those who question the Church.

When people ask “Why?” of the Church’s teachings, the question you need to ask yourself before answering, is, “Why?”

Why are they asking? Are they asking to truly seek an answer? Are they asking because they want to understand?

Or are they asking to prove themselves right and you/the Church wrong? Are they actually open to hearing the Truth?

Is there an answer you could give that could actually satisfy them? Or is the only thing that will satisfy them is being proven right? Like with a child, no matter what answer you give, they’ll just keep on asking, “Why?”

I’ve had people ask why the Church has certain teachings. And it seems like no matter what answer I give, they don’t seem to budge. Of course, that could very well be because I didn’t allow the Spirit to speak through me and I answered poorly – or horribly… I have a tendency to get defensive when being asked, and I either shut down or get too animated or upset (I don’t think I’d make a good apologist).

Asking why isn’t a bad thing – it can lead to the Truth, it can lead to understanding. I’m not saying if a person asks why that they have to now be ready to convert, but that they are ready to understand. Otherwise, you’re just another annoying little child.

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %

Many know the Parable of the Sower (Matthew 13:1-23 in case you need a refresher). Jesus reveals in this parable that the seed is the Word of God and the soil is our hearts. There’s the hard soil, the rocky soil, the soil surrounded by thorns, and the rich soil.

I’ve always thought about it as each person having a particular soil – those with hard soil having a hard heart, therefore not listening to God, etc. But when the priest shared his homily on it recently, he said something that made me think about it differently (whether he intentionally meant this or not, I’m not sure).

I think he was just talking about how one person has this soil, another has this, etc, just like how I always thought/heard about it. I don’t know if it was the way he said it, but I thought about it differently – that each one of us have different kinds of soil – that our heart could have multiple types of soil.

I used to think that I had pretty rich soil – I always went to Mass and I did a lot of ministry. Eventually I came to realize that my soil is actually surrounded by thorns – something bad happens, or something upsets me, or I’m around people who I don’t think would respond well to me talking about faith, and it’s like I never believed in God. But after listening to the priest, I think that I have different types of soil depending on what I’m supposed to do/choose/think.

Go to Mass on Sundays – rich soil

Honor parents – hard soil but becoming softer soil (don’t ask my parents to confirm this).

Carry your cross – soil surrounded by thorns (I want to, but I also like comfort and not suffering).

Don’t give into earthly desires – rocky soil (I’m really good at sharing food. . . unless it’s something I really like).

I think a lot of people are like that, which makes it really hard to meet authentic Christians. People decide for themselves which parts of Church teachings they follow – so they have rich soil for some, but hard soil for others. That doesn’t mean to blindly believe without asking questions (although there is something to be said about trusting in Jesus without the need for all of it to be proven to your satisfaction, Thomas). Just allowing the seed to be planted, and trusting that God will help it to grow as it needs to.

Just because God plants the same seed in all of us, that doesn’t mean that the tree will look the same for all of us. Every oak tree grows different. Every willow tree grows differently. Same seed, but looks different because of everything around it. Maybe for the really difficult teachings, that tree in your heart will only grow so much – but it’s better to let it grow a little than not at all, right?

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %

I miss my metabolism. It was one of the greatest things I had because I could eat pretty much whatever I wanted and I didn’t really gain a lot of weight.

But as the years have gone by my metabolism has decreased, and not only have I put on more weight, but it’s much harder to try to shed pounds. I’m not eating crazy healthy by any means, but compared to just a few years ago, it’s a drastic shift to less junk food. But it’s really hard to change my eating habits because I got so used to eating unhealthily and it not seeming to have an effect on me.

To give you an example, there was a point where I was just eating a spoon of Nutella a day, not to mention having it on a piece of bread, or in a sandwich with peanut butter (oooh baby).

But just because I wasn’t gaining weight doesn’t mean I was healthy. It just meant my body could handle it and get rid of it. My metabolism just allowed me to be unhealthy, yet appear healthy. I knew I wasn’t healthy, yet I thought I was healthier than those who were overweight – even if they just had different genes or less effective metabolism so that even if they ate well, they were just bigger people.

In the same way, growing up, I had unholy thoughts and didn’t worry too much about it. After all, most of our culture encourages having those thoughts, not to mention acting on most of them (like lustful thoughts). And because for the most of my first 20ish years of life I was single, it didn’t seem to have an effect on me.

But once I got married, those lustful thoughts became damaging to my relationship with my bride. And just like trying to change my eating habits, changing how I thought was extremely difficult.

Not impossible though.

And there are many people who would say that having those thoughts as a married man is natural and fine – but just because it’s extremely common, doesn’t make it right. After all, Jesus Himself says in Scripture:

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’
But I say to you, everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

Matthew 5:27-28

God knows what is best for us. He created us and knows that we are creatures of habit. Although on the surface, or in the moment, something might not seem like a bad thing, it can have lasting effects on our personality and the way we live our lives. And it’s not just about our relationship with God that He cares about, but our relationship with others.

I recognize that I should eat healthier, even though I don’t really want to. But if I want to be around for my kids to grow up, grow old with my wife, and be able to move around freely in old age, chances are better if I am healthier now.

I recognize that I should have healthier thoughts, even though I don’t want to all the time. But if I want to be a better husband, more faithful and loving, chances are better if my thoughts are healthier.

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %

I’ve struggled with “Days of Obligation” for Mass. It seems to have such a negative connotation to it.

“I’m obligated to go.”

Doesn’t sound very fun. Or exciting. Just sounds like something the Church forces us to do.

Yet the Church doesn’t actually force us to do anything. We choose it. We choose to be Catholic. We choose to follow the teachings of the Church that Jesus gave us.

So why does it seem there are all these rules the Church gives us? Especially when many of them aren’t explicitly said by Jesus?

You know how when you were a kid, you weren’t always grateful for everything your parents did for you? And because you weren’t grateful you didn’t show gratitude towards your parents? And even if you were grateful, you still weren’t great at showing gratitude? So your parents would have to remind you to be grateful, or to say thank you. And so you did it, even if you didn’t want to, because you knew you should.

The same goes for going to Mass. We don’t always remember to be grateful to God for everything He has blessed us with and continues to bless us with. We don’t always think about Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross and what that truly means for our lives. So the Church reminds us that because we have chosen to be Catholic, that we have made our Baptismal promises, that we have even been Confirmed and therefore finalized our initiation into the Church, we are obligated to go to Mass. Because Jesus does explicitly tell us that as often as we do this (eat this Bread and drink this Cup), we proclaim His death (1 Cor 11:26). Eucharist means thanksgiving. We go to Mass to show our gratitude.

We should go to Mass because we’re grateful, but because of everything else we choose to focus on, that we allow to distract us, we forget our gratitude. But the Church, like our parents, reminds us to say thank You.

And Jesus continues to be explicit through Scripture, because Jesus is the Word made Flesh. Which means He is the Word – not just the Gospels, or just the New Testament. The whole enchilada. And if we believe in Jesus, that means we trust in Jesus – not just believe that He is the Son of God and died for our sins. We trust His words. We trust the Word. Not just the parts we like. Not just the nice sounding phrases we can easily take out of context to fit our lives.

We are supposed to change our lives to fit His Word, not change His Word to fit our lives.

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %