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From as far back as I can remember when hearing the Passion, Judas has always been the bad guy. He was this shady character who betrayed Jesus out of greed and deserved the end he met.
But I don’t think this is how we should view Judas.
For one, it keeps giving us the “right” to judge others in the same way we judge Judas, instead of seeing his choices and mistakes with compassion. Two, it distances Judas from us and keeps us from recognizing how similar to Judas we can be.
I say this because, I have been Judas so many times in my life.
I know, hard to believe, but it’s true:
Have I ever been a follower of Christ?
Have I ever committed a [mortal] sin (because basically that’s what Judas did – he sinned)?
Have I ever not gone to Reconciliation for said sins?
Welp…guess I’ve been Judas.
That last one is where Judas really got it wrong. It wasn’t just that he sinned (we all do), but that he believed his sins were greater than God’s mercy. He was unwilling to go to Jesus face to face and ask for forgiveness. Yes, in Scripture it shows that he regretted what he did and that he tried to fix it by going to the chief priests and returning the money – but he was too ashamed to face Jesus again.
We have to stop doing this same thing to ourselves. We give all kinds of reasons to avoid going to Reconciliation. I don’t want to go to a priest who knows me… I’ll do it later… My sins aren’t that bad… God knows I’m sorry… I don’t need to confess to a priest… (I used the my sins aren’t that bad excuse most often).
Why are we afraid to go face to face with Jesus (through the priest) to confess our sins? Are they the same fears that Judas had?
Is this part of the Passion narrative there to give us someone to blame for Jesus’ Death, or is it there to tell us that no matter how horribly we sin against God, we need to know that forgiveness is within reach as long as we ask for it?
